Let's Be Honest

I love my job, but I am very much at the end of my rope. The month of March certainly came in like a lion and I'm pretty sure it ate the lamb. Ever since we returned from Christmas break, my students have been rude, repulsive, obnoxious, and the list goes on and on. I've had no intentions for my blog to be a "venting station" but tonight I cannot help myself. It is emotionally and mentally hard for me to physically get up in the mornings, knowing what awaits me. My principal has been supportive, but the assistant principal (who gets clean up duty on all the behavioral problems) isn't my knight in shining armor. Sure he's a decent guy, but c'mon who's really running the show? A kid literally ran down the next hall when I approached him about skipping his class and when the referral that I submitted came back to me, all that was written in chicken scratch at the bottom was "warning." That's it?! Are you kidding me?! A kid can get irate, disrespect me, take off running down the hall to an area he's not supposed to be, and yet he gets off free? I wish I were making this up. This is only one story of which I have tenfold to share.

Yes I am complaining, but don't pity me, and above all else please do not give me any advice about classroom management. I've seen these kids day in and day out since September and I've tried all tricks of the trade.  What I'm really saying is please pray for my sanity. I feel that during this challenging time I should be more focused on the Lord, and yet I constantly am getting distracted and discouraged. I realize that you do not know the fullness of my story and the situation or school I am part of, but anything that can take your eyes off the prize is not good. Above all else, I am worried that because I have not been diligent unto the Lord, that He won't take me out of my current situation either. Adam and I have been praying for direction for so long and we both feel that He is calling us out of this location, but no doors have been opened. I know better than to worry and if God truly wants me to remain here for His purpose then I will; it's just not what I want right now. So please say a little prayer for me and ask that I can keep my eyes and heart focused on what really matters.